I used to spend a lot of time meditating. For a few months I meditated around three hours a day, while attending college. I don’t meditate any more.

I’m not any less enlightened than I was then. The difference is just that I don’t have my enlightenment regimented to occur at specific times in my day. What I didn’t realize then is that it’s all meditation, if you let it be. I don’t ever sit down and say to myself, “now I am going to meditate.” But that doesn’t mean that meditation isn’t happening. Like breathing or sneezing, it just happens, without me asking it to.

I had to get past several different thoughts. I had to get past the idea that I am naturally impure, and need to do something special to be enlightened. I had to get past my skepticism about my spirituality, which needed some observable, measurable indicator of my spirituality in order to believe in it. I had to get past the idea that it is a good idea to use force on myself to become more enlightened.

In retrospect, I think the need for a measurable indicator was the biggest reason that I meditated so much. The need for proof has a very powerful sway over me.

  1. Meditation: Two Schools of Thought « antitheology

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